“Psychological research has shown something else about “getting” or
“achieving” some external, circumstantial state as the path to
happiness. It does not last. It has a short shelf life. So,
not only do our circumstances and achievements account for only a small
percentage of our happiness, but even what they are able to contribute
evaporates pretty quickly. Why?
“It seems that there is some sort of “set point” to our level of happiness that we carry around, almost like a thermostat. Let’s ay your set point from factors other than circumstances is at 70. Then you get that new house, and you jump to 80 or, for a day, to what feels like 100! This happens, for instance, when people first fall in love with the persons of their dreams. They may even exceed 100 in that initial state. (That explains a lot of crazy behavior.) But whether it in the house, the raise, or the relationship, what research has shown us is that we come back down to the place we were before. We return to our set point. This is called the “hedonic treadmill.” This is why, as common sense will tell you, you can look back at things you thought you would “just die for,” and now they are stored in the garage and you don’t care much for them anymore. Their power has gone away. Compare children on Christmas morning to those same children a few months later when the toys they were so excited to find under the tree lie around no longer used.” – Henry Cloud in The Law of Happiness
It is sad that we can’t stay on the mountain-top of happiness, but we all have to go to valleys to understand the mountain-top experiences. Real life has its ups and down that we experience.
Renee Madison, MA, LPC, CSAT is a counselor in Colorado. She can be reached for appointments at 303-257-7623 or 970-324-6928.
“It seems that there is some sort of “set point” to our level of happiness that we carry around, almost like a thermostat. Let’s ay your set point from factors other than circumstances is at 70. Then you get that new house, and you jump to 80 or, for a day, to what feels like 100! This happens, for instance, when people first fall in love with the persons of their dreams. They may even exceed 100 in that initial state. (That explains a lot of crazy behavior.) But whether it in the house, the raise, or the relationship, what research has shown us is that we come back down to the place we were before. We return to our set point. This is called the “hedonic treadmill.” This is why, as common sense will tell you, you can look back at things you thought you would “just die for,” and now they are stored in the garage and you don’t care much for them anymore. Their power has gone away. Compare children on Christmas morning to those same children a few months later when the toys they were so excited to find under the tree lie around no longer used.” – Henry Cloud in The Law of Happiness
It is sad that we can’t stay on the mountain-top of happiness, but we all have to go to valleys to understand the mountain-top experiences. Real life has its ups and down that we experience.
Renee Madison, MA, LPC, CSAT is a counselor in Colorado. She can be reached for appointments at 303-257-7623 or 970-324-6928.
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