"As you wonder about your own childhood, you might ask yourself if any of the following happened when you were a child: Was I frequently left alone to play by myself? Was I taken out as a show item and then put away when no longer needed? Was I expected to meet the needs of my caregivers more than my own needs? Was I expected to manage my caregivers' emotional world or self esteem? Was I expected to stay young, cute, and dependent? Was I expected to grow up quickly, act self-sufficient, and not be a problem? Were my caregivers sensitive to my needs or did they frequently misread me? "Before we go further, I want to clarify that this snapshot of your childhood is not about whether or not you were loved by your parents. I don't want to give the impression I'm talking about love. what I'm describing has less to do with love and more to do with safety and security and the underlying attitudes we bring to a relationship." - Stan Tatkin, ...
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