Skip to main content

Circumstances don't cause happiness

"The fact that our circumstances have limited power to make us happy has been documented in the research; but if you think about it for a minute, you already know this from your observations while standing at the check-out counter at any grocery store.  Look at the magazine headlines and you will see rich, beautiful, accomplished, famous, slim, and successful people, but with all sorts of unhappiness, from relational turmoil to drug abuse and overdose, and even suicide.  If circumstantial things could bring us lasting happiness, we would not be seeing those sad headlines.  And the flip side is this: if circumstantial things and events are the sources of happiness, why are there so many happy people who don't have many of those things going for them?  In fact, studies have shown that the happiness levels between rich people and average-income people is not that different.  The findings say that once a certain safety and sustenance level has been reached, more money is not going to bring much more happiness." - Henry Cloud in The Law of Happiness

Circumstances are wonderful when they happen but they only account for 10 percent of our happiness.  As in the above paragraph, getting your dreams come true in fame and fortune do not cause permanent happiness.

Renee Madison, MA, LPC, CSAT is a counselor in Colorado.  She can be reached for appointments at 303-257-7623 or 970-324-6928.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Retrain Brain

"Consider stroke victims.  Medical science has made huge advances in patient survival after even massive stokes, some of which can be attributed to better medications and to the upsurge of trauma units, since stokes are ideally dealt with as soon as possible.  Quick treatment is saving countless lives, compared to the past. "But survival isn't the same as recovery.  No drugs show comparable success in allowing victims to recover from paralysis, the most common effect of a stroke.  ...with stroke patients everything seems to depend on feedback.  In the past they mostly sat in a chair with medical attention, and their course of least resistance was to use the side of the body that was unaffected by their stroke.  Now rehabilitation activly takes the course of most resistance.  If a patient's left hand is paralyzed, for example, the therapist will have her use only that hand to pick up a coffee cup or comb her hair. "At first these tasks a...

Endings are natural

"Today may be the enemy of your tomorrow. "In your business and perhaps your life, the tomorrow that you desire and envision may never come to pass if you do not end some things you are doing today.  For some people, that is clear and easy to execute.   They end the things that are holding them back.  For others it is more difficult.... "Endings are a natural part of the universe, and your life and business must face them, stagnate, or die.  They are an inherent reality....  There are different kinds of endings and that learning how to tell one form the other will ensure some successes and prevent many failures and much misery, ending substantial pain and turmoil that you or your business may now be encountering." Dr. Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings Most endings are hard to do, hard to walk through and seem not necessary.  However, when we hold on to the situations, people or things when we need to let go of them we can then experie...

Accepting a compliment

"Nearly everyone who is asked, 'What is the proper response to a compliment?' replies, 'Say 'thank you.''  But when actually offered a compliment, only a third of people accept it so simply and smoothly, found linguist Robert Herbert of Binghamton University. "The difficulty lies in the fact that a compliment ('What a nice sweater!') has two levels: a gift component (accept or reject) and a content component (agree or disagree).  The addressee is confronted with a  dilemma--how to respond simultaneously to both: 'I must agree with the speaker and thank him for the gift of a compliment while avoiding self-praise.' "Contrary to conventional wisdom, women aren't worse than men at accepting compliments.  It is the gender of the compliment-giver that most influences the response.  Women and men are both more likely to accept a compliment coming from a man than from a woman.  When a man says, 'Nice scarf," a...