Psychology Help Today

"Children do not plot ways to stress out their parents, break all the rules, and wreak havoc.  They do not wish to be aggressive, lie, break things, or make you totally miserable--at least not unless they are really angry with you!  They would like to have a peaceful, safe family life in which they feel loved.  Often their behavior is about feeling unloved, unaccepted, or unsafe.  'Safe,' for children, often means feeling solidly connected to their parents or caregivers (securely attached). "Sometime children's tears, temper tantrums, and aggression are the result of being overwhelmed with feelings that they don't know how to manage.  For a child who is neurologically sensitive, physical sensations can be overwhelming.  The idea of have to endure socks that itch or a bothersome seam all day can be unbearable, and when others don't understand, the child is torn between her own experience and the impressions of others.  Sometimes children...

"How many people actually know how to spontaneously make their partner feel happy and loved?  I'm talking here about a phrase, a deed or an expression aimed at one's partner meant specifically to uplift him or her.  I have seen partners married for thirty years who appear dumbfounded when challenged to brighten, move charm, or otherwise enamor one another. Yet this ability to spontaneously and predictably shift or elevate your partner's mood or emotional state is a crucial aspect of being an expert on your partner. "In my work with couples, I have found most people don't want their partner to change, not really.  They fundamentally appreciate their partners as they are.  But what people do want is to know how to influence, motivate, and otherwise have a positive effect on their partner.  They want to avoid pushing the other's buttons.  But that is not enough.  They also want to know the antidotes to apply when things go awry.  They ...